Comic transcript

Broccoli pushes a shopping cart. Waffles is walking beside them. A sign reads "AISLE x6j#7."

Broccoli looks at a shelf. It contains OAT, SNAIL EGGS, a head with a tag reading 'Brush my hair!'

ANTI-MATTER, SALSA, BORB...

Broccoli looks at the piece of paper in their hand.

RECIPE

1 Rice Flour

Sugar

water

corn starch

Red bean

Each item has been crossed out except the last.

Waffles reaches for a sword.

Broccoli: WAFFLES, NO.

Waffles: Come on

Broccoli: NO! I mean just look at this!!

$14.99 - 7lbs. CURSED ANCIENT SWORD THAT REAPS THE SOULS OF ITS VICTIMS

Broccoli: It's waaay too expensive. Remember your budget, Waffles

Waffles: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmeh...

"AISLE o2j#7"

Broccoli: This is why you're in debt.

Waffles: ACTUALLY It's because of my student loans. But whatever

Broccoli looks down aisle x62j#7. Past boxes of LOVE, PAIN, and EAT YOUR SPARKLES YOU SAD GIRL, they see a fish-like, blue girl with a flashlight.

Girl: ARE YOU REAL?

Broccoli: Uhhhhhhhhhh

Waffles: hissss

Broccoli: Yeah I- Yes I'm pretty sure. I am. Yeah

Girl: So what Brings you to the EVERYTHING STORE?

Broccoli: well- My friend and I are gonna make mochi. We're looking for some... RED BEAN But we're kind of LOST... I mean if it's not too much trouble-

Girl: NO! NOT AT ALL!

The girl shows them a shopping cart parked next to some cans of cat repellent.

Girl: CLIMB ABOARD on this BOARD! I'M SO LONELY. The name's Sucre! like SOO-CRAY!

Broccoli: I'm Broccoli- HEY!

Sucre grabs Broccoli's arm.

SQUISH

Sucre: SORRY! Just checkin to see if you're a ghost or something. WHOA! You're so squishy. DO YOU WANT TO BE MY FRIEND?

Broccoli: HECK YEAH

Sucre: You get in here too pussy!

Waffles: I suppose the "power of friendship" will push the cart?

Broccoli: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Waffles: OH.

The cart races off.

Sucre: Y'all picked the right gal. I know these aisles like the back of my hand. YOU'LL FIND THE RED BEANS OVER IN AISLE XJS1#3 Next to the Uranium and the cardboard cutouts of Frank Sinatra. It'll be mighty TREACHEROUS. First we gotta go through... The Aisle of NON-EUCLIDEAN SHAPES

Broccoli: Can we HOLD HANDS?

Sucre: YES! THIS isn't even the scary part.

Waffles: Hands on the wheel

Sucre: AND NOW The Aisle of FISH WHO CALL YOU MEAN NAMES!

Various Fish: You're the worst. MONSTER! poopie head! rapscallion! miscreant! scoundrel!

Broccoli: Why are they so MEAN?

Broccoli turns back to Sucre. She holds a crying fish with a bite taken out of it. Waffles has one, too.

Sucre: mmmmmm. One of the ineffable mysteries of the Everything Store...

The cart keeps moving past Aisles XYP#1-XYP#3.

Broccoli: Does this place make you feel small, Sucre? so many aisles...

They pass a display table marked 'leg.' Another is marked 'CLEARANCE!' A third, 'spoilers.'

Sucre: We're getting close... You might wanna give me your hand again

Broccoli: Kay!

Sucre handcuffs Broccoli to the cart.

SNAP!

Broccoli: HUH? um... Sucre?

Waffles: WHAT'S YOUR DEAL!?

Sucre ties Waffles up.

Broccoli: SUCRE THIS IS NOT VERY POLITE AND GOOD OF YOU!

Sucre: YES IT IS! Next isle is the Sirens

Sucre has handcuffed herself to the cart as well.

Sucre: Not many can resist their song! good thing I tied you down! Not everyone is... so lucky. WE'RE APPROACHING NOW

The cart races on into deep shadow.